The Wonders of a Well Chosen Team Motto
by Cheeno
Summary: The motto "always become stronger than yesterday" has been very beneficial for Team Guy. Inspired by their tale, Naruto decides that the super awesome Team Kakashi deserves one as well. After all, their team will be legendary, and their names remembered always for their awesomeness, dattebayo! Crack-fic-attempt. I hope the rating is ok, based on some language (Sai).


It's been a long time since I submitted anything, but I felt it was time for this one-shot. It's been on my computer for months. It's an attempt at a crack-fic, based upon episode 28 of Shippuden. Basically, this is written for fellow Naruto fans out there who agrees that "becoming stronger than yesterday" was not a good was to resolve the 'team Guy vs. clones' fight. Especially because they were all hurt and exhausted, and in the middle of a fight - how could they possibly just become stronger? Why not do something cool, like figuring out and exploit ones weaknesses? Oh well... Anyway, this idea is based on my boyfriends joke as we watched the episode. Enjoy :)

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. If I did, they would have defeated the clones based on their own weaknesses.

 **The Wonders of a Well Chosen Team Motto**

After the rescue of Gaara from Akatsuki, back in Konoha

In the audience of Konoha's Rookie Nine, no eyes were bigger than those of Uzumaki Naruto.

"And so, our imitations had nearly beaten us - even with their unyouthful lack of souls."

"But then, even as my weapons lay scattered around me, Lee came up with The Solution-"

"Yosh! Arigato, Tenten! Because, we made a promise, in our youth. To always become stronger than yesterday. Thus, even after hours of fighting our never-tiring clones, our motto saved us!"

The white eyes of one Hyūga prodigy were smugly proud, even through his stoic mask. Lee renewed the promise with the nice-guy-pose, blinding everyone slightly with sparkling teeth, such that no one saw Tenten admiring her flashy teammate.

"We _crushed_ those fake bastards!" Tenten finalized the tale. "And we will always continue to be stronger than yesterday!"

"This is our team motto – our promise of a lifetime!" Another blinding nice-guy-smile. Blue eyes sparkled in the flash, eagerly turning towards a pinkette.

"Sakura-chan, we must get a motto!"

"As much as that was an inspiring tale, Naruto, I think we are doing fine already..."

"I have read that this sort of ritual is good for team morale and bonding. I am willing to participate in this. Besides, you both seem to need all the help you can get, Ugly, Dickless." Sai proceeded by expertly dodging an otherwise lethal punch, his friendly smile never faltering.

One blonde and one pinkette were soon out of sight trying to kill their teammate – if they could catch him, that is.

"Troublesome..."

"Yeah, anyone wishing to be on that team would need the protection of immortality to survive a week." Ino shook her head in wonder, oblivious to the glint of irony crossing Shikamaru's eyes.

"Or even five minutes." Kiba smirked smugly, thinking of his own, very easy going teammates. Akamaru gave the bark of agreement.

Some days later

"I've got it!"

"Got what, Naruto?" Sakura glanced at her between-branches friend, leaping at full speed to next tree.

"We are awesome, powerful, and we never give up! We'll bring Sasuke back, save the world and become legends! We are immortal!"

"..."

"..."

"Come on! Our motto!" Naruto was unperturbed by the non-perceiving silence. "Do I have to spell it out? WE ARE IMMORTAL!"

"Fine." Sakura conceded with a sigh, and a hidden, slight smile. "We are immortal."

"Sai?"

"For the sake of this 'team', even though it sounds stupid, I will join you. We are immortal."

A year later

They had finally joined forces, Naruto's Kyūbi fitting perfectly with Sasuke's Susanoo. "Now we truly are immortal!" Naruto was overflowing with the excitement of their awesomeness.

"What?" Sasuke looked at Naruto in bafflement.

"It's our team motto. Because _we_ are going into legend. We are immortal." Naruto awaited the proper response with expectation, then with a reaproachful glare.

Sasuke rolled his Sharingan-struck eyes, conceding. "Fine, dobe. We are immortal."

Five billion years later

"Shit, Dickless, that was the last livable planet." Sai would have paled, if not for the already milky white complexion of his skin. Bits of planet debris floated lazily away in every direction, keeping company with four old figures, suspended in space.

"So now what? I'm holding you responsible for this, Naruto!" A chakra-infused fist barely missed its target, whilst the happy stars of the galaxy were reflected in enraged green eyes.

"How am _I_ to blame for this?" The former blonde frowned with the power of the rightfully indignant.

"Dobe, that motto was _your_ idea. I will forever seek vengeance for this!" Two pools of black began to spin into dangerous red.

Naruto sought shelter from his infuriated teammates inside a black hole. Three words were fiercely whispered into the emptiness: "Damn you, immortality!"


End file.
